To err is human...but to "misspeak" takes a Clinton

There appears to be a certain mental condition or aberration that exists within the Clinton family that results in them having a clear grasp on reality.

Back in 1998, clenching his jaw and pointing his finger for emphasis, President Clinton denied, in far more forceful terms than before, that he had had a sexual relationship with Monica Lewinsky and coached her to lie about it.

"I want you to listen to me," Clinton said, as he glared at cameras. "I'm going to say this again, I did not have sexual relations with that woman, Miss Lewinsky. I never told anybody to lie, not a single time -- never. These allegations are false. And I need to go back to work for the American people."

At the time I thought that Bill had been "lying". Now I realise I was w..w..wrong!

Hilary Clinton has recently claimed, in a recent description of a 1996 trip to Bosnia, that she landed amid sniper fire. Mrs Clinton did this when she gave a foreign policy speech designed to demonstrate she is more battle-ready to be commander-in-chief on "day one" than her less experienced rival, Barack Obama.

Her recollection of her landing near Tuzla was nothing if not vivid. "I remember landing under sniper fire," she said. "There was supposed to be some kind of greeting ceremony at the airport, but instead we just ran with our heads down to get into the vehicles to get to our base."

The above picture of Hillary and her daughter Chelsea clearly shows them both running with their heads down, and had the resolution of the picture been even better, presumably we would actually be able to see the sniper bullets to which she referred!

Or maybe we wouldn't because CBS News has now aired footage showing her calmly alighting from her military aircraft and indeed participating in an arrival ceremony. At this point I once again assumed that she had been lying in her recent speech.

Seemingly, once again I was w...w...wrong!

It appears that neither Hillary nor Bill were "lying", it is just that they both "misspoke"!

I had never heard of this term before, but given that it has been used by some of the most powerful people in the world, I guess it must be OK. It is also comforting to know that I have personally never lied about anything in my life.

But as for "misspeaking"? Possibly!

Clinton loses chance of Democratic Party nomination

Whilst I clearly don't want to tempt fate, it appears as though Barack Obama, has just sealed the Democratic Party nomination by doing....nothing.

It will not be his momentous "race" speech that will do it, even though the strategy of testing the response of the nature ahead of the Philly primary, was a great tactic, as he had little to lose, as he is currently 12 points behind Hills.

What has just secured him the victory has in fact been a 6 year old video of Hillary Clinton lending her support to....Heather Mills.

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=WlFsVi5zuhc

Whilst some may question Obama's choice of friend & local priest, everyone will question the Hillary's judgement over who she considers to be worthy of praise. And if anyone is worthy of praise about anything, it is not Heather Mills!!

This is a little sad as I was just about to suggest that Hillary could possible start to use a new campaign slogan, that re-worked the saying "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" - something like "A bird in the House is worth two x George Bush", but now I won't even bother.

Is it because I'm black?

It is clear that the comments of Geraldine Ferraro when she claimed that Barack Obama was "...only successful because he was black", have been heavily criticised, and have resulted in her having to resign from the Clinton campaign team.

However, doesn't this signify progress in a world that has too much discrimination? (whether on the grounds of race, sex, sexuality, disability etc etc).

When Ferraro said "If he was a white man, he would not be in this position", the implication was that he was "lucky" to be black.

Now I'm not sure that luck had a lot to do with it. More a case of genetics and black parents I would have thought.

But "lucky" to be black? It's not long ago that such a comment would have been inconceivable. To suggest that somebody was at an advantage because they were black, would have been considered (if there were such a word) oxymoronic!

Maybe, and I realise this is a controversial thing to say, just maybe, he is ahead in the polls because he is better than the opposition! Or would such a comment be considered to be sexist?

America - it's time for a little creativity

In a week where we are about to have a "Super" Tuesday, (and possibly a fantastic Wednesday, terrific Thursday etc etc) is it not time for the people of America to become a little more creative.

If the land of the free is really one of the greatest democracies in the world, why is it that there is a strong possibility that by 2017, they will have had 16 years of the Clinton dynasty and 12 years of the Bush dynasty.

Whilst both of these families are poles apart in their political views, is it not time to give another family a chance?

There are rumours (I'm sure completely unfounded) that Bill Clinton has been secretely telling voters not to forget the problems seen in Kenya, Angola and Zimbabwe, "...all of whom have black Presidents" and that they shouldn't therefore make the same mistake and vote for Obama!!"

But this is the time to be bold. People of America, the world looks to you to make the right choice. I know that the journey is only just beginning, but make a statement, start the momentum...vote Obama.

2008 Christmas No1

After mentioning Obama's New Hampshire speech yesterday, I was interested to hear reports of some of its detail, which I hadn't listened previously listed to, but which appeared to reach out to the people, of all ages.

With his wife and daughter by his side and referring to Hillary Clinton's victory, Barack O (as he's known on the street) eloquently, and some would say lyrically, covered issues of race, diversity, decision making and choice as he recounted in his southern drawl what messages he had been delivering in the hustings.

He told the democrat supporters present: -

"...And I told about equality, an' its true, either you're wrong or you're right. But, if you're thinkin' about my baby it don't matter if you're black or white"

How prophetic!

Without wishing to over analyse exactly what each word meant, I believe that he has often referred to America itself as being his "baby", something he cares almost as deeply about as his own child. These selfless words reflect his desire for change and for the American people to decide between either him or Hillary Clinton, and that despite his personal ambitions it doesn't matter which of them they choose, because whichever one they choose, that choice is better than the Republican alternative.

The man is almost becoming a rock star, and is already the 6/4 favourite at Ladbrokes to be No. 1 in the UK singles chart this Christmas (presumably - and this is a prediction - beating Chantelle, from Essex who will win the fourth X Factor series after "amazingly" coming from behind (?) to beat Gavin, 21, a 17-stone, peroxide blond, gay, male Liverpudlian op/rock vocalist from a broken home and who only got to the final with the support of his"friend" Derek, 53 from Cheadle, and who will became famous throughout the series for crying more than singing - sweet!)

Is Obama Sin Laden?

It must be extremely annoying - albeit totally avoidable - when after many years of striving to achieve political office, an individual's moment of glory is marred by the "gutter" press publishing damaging news of either prior financial ruin, sexual misdemeanors or some other act which succeeds in damaging their reputation before they've even had time to build one.

There have been plenty of examples of political indiscretions, of which the following are just 3 in a long list: -

Bill Clinton, the former US President, who, with reference to Monica Lewinsky stated - "I did not have sexual relations with that woman".

Charles Kennedy, the former Liberal Democrat leader, who in an interview with David Dimbleby declared - "Yes, I'm actually an extremely moderate and infrequent consumer of alcohol as a matter of fact."

Mark Oaten, the disgraced Liberal Democrat MP who stated - after being outed - that "...going bald and a mid-life crisis had led him to have an affair with a male prostitute.

[Clearly Bill's eyesight was poorer than we knew ("...AW sorry, I thought you were pointing at THAT woman"); Charles didn't have frequent spells of drinking alcohol, just one and therefore he was by definition an infrequent consumer of alcohol. However, the one time that he had drank alcohol lasted from 1988 to 2007!; Mark, on the other hand was simply a bald, gay man, who had been pretending to be a liberal democrat MP!]

So what is the position with Barack Obama? Does he have a past laden with sin, or is he as clean-cut and wholesome as he is being made out to be? If he has skeleton's in his cupboard, should he let them out now or risk having them let out for him in the future, thereby destroying his prospects of making US political history and becoming the first black US President, and also the first President with a name that invites those around him to "...jeer or shout at him".

So Mr Obama, if you have a drink, financial or marital problem in your past let us know now so that the American people can decide whether or not you are fit to become the most powerful man in the world.

However, if your problems are either intellectual or involve corruption, dishonesty or deceit, then feel free to keep them secret. George Bush has all of these qualities and he survived for 2 terms!

But how?

Hello Barack & Isaac, Goodbye Donald!

As days go, January 4th felt somewhat inferior to other monthly "4ths".

For example it never expected to get into the movies, and certainly not in a speaking part, as May 4th had done in Star Wars.

It was also not ready to leave home in search of independence as July 4th had done, prior to heading off for America.

January 4th was simply an ordinary day.

It wasn't as though it hadn't seen life (or death) it had and plenty of it.

Sir Isaac Newton was born on January 4th 1643 - well actually Isaac Newton was born, the 'Sir' bit coming some time later.

Wouldn't it have been a great piece of foresight if he had been christened 'Sir' Isaac, or, in fact an even greater achievement, if the honour had been bestowed upon him at birth for 'services to Science whilst in the womb'.

Just think, if the 17th century midwifery practice had changed at midnight on 3 January 1643, from encouraging women to give birth lying down, to giving birth standing up...Isaac could - albeit theoretically -have discovered gravity upon entry (and fairly rapid entry at that) into the world.

However, depending upon the actual speed of "entry", January 4th could have become renowned for the birth, knighthood and death of baby Sir Isaac, AND the discovery of gravity all in the space of (regal administrative prior planning permitting) a few minutes.

Anyway, sadly life didn't turn out that way and it was not until 1967 when January 4th saw a notable death, when Donald Campbell also discovered gravity as well as the fact that whilst at 0 mph water is quite soft...at 300mph it feels (although only very briefly in Donald's case as he was soon to end up permanently "in the soup") as hard as concrete!

However, there is a slight chance that January 4th may achieve the notoriety that it deserves and in the future be recognised as the day the world realised that America was soon to get its first black President!

Welcome Barack Obama!

Link betwen divorce and cheese discovered!

Once again we set out into the great unknown of a new year that is to be 2008 with confusing facts all around us.

Apparently, according to an article in this morning's paper, in 2006 the number of divorces in Great Britain was 18% lower than in 1992, the year that Prince Andrew and Fergie (of the royal, rather than black eyed peas variety) split.

This raises a number of questions. Firstly why do some statisticians take so long to produce their data and is this any reflection on their overall level of expertise?

I don't want to know about 2006's figures I want 2007's. Secondly, how do the UK's figures compare with the rest of the world.

Apparently the UK divorce rate is running at 53%, but, the experts (ha!) state that these are nowhere near as high as in Sweden (64%), Russia (65%) or Belarus (68%).

They go on to state that: -

"...one factor that has never been fully quantified is the temperature, since the highest divorce rates all occur in sub-zero temperatures."

I must say that my earlier concern regarding the aptitude of these experts is increasing. When faced with the serious issue of divorce rates - it is a significant leap across the statistical divide to create a link with temperature as the most significant cause.

Some ill informed individuals (of which I am clearly not one) might offer contradictory views such as "...Rubbish, what do you expect? Have you never seen a Belorussian woman?"

To which I would have to respond "...no, but I have seen Anna Kournakova so what's your point?" (Thank you Charlotte - but you don't actually have to point every time!).

Linking divorce rates with low temperatures is as useful or insightful as linking it with the number of stray cats in the country, or mice, or cheese. Come to think of it each of these items - especially in Belorussian 'cartoon-land - is related. There are (really there are!) large numbers of stray cats in Belarus, presumably due to a plentiful supply of mice, who can surely only survive in the low temperatures with copious supplies of cheese. (What do you mean mice don't really like cheese?)

Therefore, as valid a causal link as low temperatures and high divorce rates is that of cheese and high divorce rates. Whilst a somewhat bizarre theory, we should really try to persuade others that it may be true. Otherwise George Dubblya Bush, may try to use a continuation of global warming policies as a means of increasing the sanctity of marriage in the US.

In a another headline today, it was stated that: -

"Paul McCartney has operation on his heart".

Is it only me, or the vast majority of the population in the UK who immediately thought of the words "...after having been broken by Heather Mills"!